Why is this an issue?

Recently, one of my cousins posted a “post this for 1 hour if you agree” status update on her Facebook page. The message was in support of gay rights. Someone on her Friends list posted judgmental comments and made discriminating remarks against gays and homosexuals. It got so bad that she had to block him. (This was a childhood friend.) While I’m all for gay rights and agree we should not judge them (only God can judge), I have to wonder why a person’s sexual preference is even made an issue. Why is it so important that we all know what everyone does in the bedroom?

The reason why I feel this way is because I just don’t see the logic in judging someone based on their sexual preference. Whatever happened to judging someone based on their character? Their skills? How about judging someone for how they treat others? Is any of this making any sense?

A person’s sexual preference does not interfere with how well they can do a job or how they treat others. Heck, it does not even influence how they treat their co-workers! (And on that note, I’ve heard of some straight employees who treat their co-workers pretty rotten.)

And yet, sadly, we live in a society where a person’s sexual preference is being judged, even harshly. This is just so wrong. If a person is gay, then no matter what they have done in the past, what kind of perfect record they have at their job or how nice they have been to others, they are OUT OF HERE. Apparently, some people are just so insecure, self-righteous, homophobic or judgmental that they simply won’t tolerate being around someone who is homosexual. Once again a person’s sexual preference is being judged, and not their character.

In some way, I guess people are always going to find something to judge another person with. If it’s not their sexual preference, it’s their religion, the color of their skin or what university they graduated from. People these days are so judgmental of others that to NOT have some kind of judgment against people seems almost unreasonable.

We should not judge other people. It’s not for us to get on our high horse and say “I am better than you.” Really, is anybody really so perfect themselves that they can be in a position to judge everybody else? And on the note of judging a homosexual: Can’t people even see past this difference and get to know the PERSON instead? Stop seeing someone as “gay” or “lesbian.” See them as a HUMAN BEING.

Because, bottom line, that’s what they are. That’s what we all are. We’re all in this world together, and if we want to survive in this world together, we need to stop this hatred, stop this discrimination and stop this judgment of each other. Life itself is hard enough. Let's not make this journey any harder.

In defense of straight marriages

I recently came across a popular claim made in the gay community. It's one of those sayings that gets recycled based on current events but it goes something like this: "X% of heterosexual couples break up at a rate of X%, children coming from dysfunctional homes are usually in homes with heterosexual spouses, domestic violence and abuse among heterosexual couples is X%. Meanwhile, a low percentage of abuse, violence, family dysfunction and divorce happens among the gay couples in America. Which option looks better to you? Obviously, gay couples are better than straight couples, because we stay together longer!"

In this case, someone was saying how Elizabeth Taylor was looking for Husband #7 and Larry King was having his fourth divorce. Because of these two items, the person said that ALL straight marriages are doomed and ALL gay marriages are perfect.

I beg to differ.

Just because a straight couple are breaking up or divorcing or because a straight person is getting married for a certain number of times, this does not reflect on what kind of sexual orientation is better. In fact, I know of gay people who have broken up with their significant others. I know gay people who have had many on-again and off-again relationship cycles. I know of stories of violence and interpersonal abuse happening between gay couples.

You know what? We're all the same whether we are gay or straight. Nothing lasts forever, not even relationships. Not even marriages. Whether you are gay or straight does NOT make you immune to violence, abuse, infidelity, separation or divorce. It can happen to ANYBODY. And I'm tired of people in the gay community saying "gay is better because our relationships last longer." Bull. I know of straight marriages that have lasted longer than certain gay relationships or gay marriages. One does not negate the other.

And one is definitely not better than the other, either.