Casting call

Sometime ago, we received an advertisement in the mail for a local casting call here in Eugene. There was a talent agent or director (it didn't specify) scouting out new faces among children and teens. As I looked over the advertisement, I debated whether or not I should take Jennifer. I have come across so many horror stories of child stars growing up addicted to drugs, committing suicide or going bad. If Jennifer was selected, what kind of future would that mean for her? And what kind of childhood would that mean for her? I sure wasn't going to let her grow up being a prima donna, but I also didn't want her to miss out on having a fun, NORMAL childhood. (Normal? Gee, what IS normal, anyway??)

Still, I decided it couldn't hurt. We could do it just for fun. On a whim. Just give it a shot and see what happens. And, ultimately, I could see what the LIKELY future in television would mean to her.

So today, the big moment arrived. I waited until late afternoon to take her, partly because I was DREADING a huge crowd and dreading standing in line for hours. So I did my writing work (started work on a new book! woo-hoo!), made lunch and cleaned the house. On our way, I explained to Jennifer what it was about and that she'd be on TV. Hearing this, she said, "Moooom. I'm nervous."

I smiled, patted her leg and said, "Don't be nervous, sweetie. Just be yourself. You'll do fine." I remembered my own time in front of a camera, when I was on the news at age 11 because of the toe-to-thumb transplant on my left hand. I had been nervous then, too, but I didn't think about the camera filming me. I only thought about the reporter who sat next to me, talking casually and asking questions. I just focused on THAT and not on the camera. For Jennifer, she'd HAVE to face the camera. They weren't going to give her a script to read because she was under 7 but she WOULD have to talk in front of it.

As I continued the drive, though, I wondered if I was setting her up for a future she'd end up resenting me for. I tried to imagine seeing a movie or TV show with her name in the cast of characters. How would I feel about that? How would SHE feel about that? Would she even be happy with this career "forced" upon her??

I tried to stay positive, though, as we got closer to our destination. We were on a mission to have FUN! We were just doing this on a whim. If they didn't select her, it wasn't going to ruin anything. At least we gave it a shot!

And I guess my determined enthusiasm rubbed off on Jennifer because when we got there, she was practically bouncing in her seat and going, "I'm gonna be on TV!" I mentally applauded her, thinking, 'That's the spirit!'

Once inside, I was soooo relieved to see that there wasn't a looong line. Hoozah! I filled out an application about Jennifer, puzzling over why they wanted to know what size she wore. Then we got in line. Jennifer is normally very sociable but while we stood in line, she clung to me, locking her arms around my stomach. I half expected her to at least talk with the other children in line, but she barely noticed them. How strange she acted so insecure! I had to smile over the teen boys in line who kept fussing with their hair but soon I was fussing with Jennifer's hair, too, wiping away imagined hairs on her clothes and making sure her pants weren't wrinkled.

When they called her up, I handed the lady at the desk the form as Jennifer took her place in front of the camera. I was nervous she would crack but she LOVED it and even asked to see what the cameraman saw. He asked her to state her full name and age, then to smile for the camera as he took her picture. She did her "babydoll" pose and he laughed as he took her picture. They were both smiling as they told us they'll let us know if she's accepted and we both left.

Wow! With that done with, every single sense of apprehension I had faded away. That was SO EASY and no trouble at all! Neither of us cracked and we both walked away from it energized and happy. Even if they don't select her, it doesn't matter. We still had fun and I'm glad I got past my doubts to take her there.

Later, when I took her to PlayLand, Jennifer bounced in front of the guardian there and announced, "I was on TV!"

I smiled, briefly wondering if that's an announcement she'll be repeating ten years down the road.