Saturday, April 24, 2010

In defense of straight marriages

I recently came across a popular claim made in the gay community. It's one of those sayings that gets recycled based on current events but it goes something like this: "X% of heterosexual couples break up at a rate of X%, children coming from dysfunctional homes are usually in homes with heterosexual spouses, domestic violence and abuse among heterosexual couples is X%. Meanwhile, a low percentage of abuse, violence, family dysfunction and divorce happens among the gay couples in America. Which option looks better to you? Obviously, gay couples are better than straight couples, because we stay together longer!"

In this case, someone was saying how Elizabeth Taylor was looking for Husband #7 and Larry King was having his fourth divorce. Because of these two items, the person said that ALL straight marriages are doomed and ALL gay marriages are perfect.

I beg to differ.

Just because a straight couple are breaking up or divorcing or because a straight person is getting married for a certain number of times, this does not reflect on what kind of sexual orientation is better. In fact, I know of gay people who have broken up with their significant others. I know gay people who have had many on-again and off-again relationship cycles. I know of stories of violence and interpersonal abuse happening between gay couples.

You know what? We're all the same whether we are gay or straight. Nothing lasts forever, not even relationships. Not even marriages. Whether you are gay or straight does NOT make you immune to violence, abuse, infidelity, separation or divorce. It can happen to ANYBODY. And I'm tired of people in the gay community saying "gay is better because our relationships last longer." Bull. I know of straight marriages that have lasted longer than certain gay relationships or gay marriages. One does not negate the other.

And one is definitely not better than the other, either.


Anonymous said...

agreed. both are same.

Dawn Colclasure said...

Thanks for commenting, Nancy. :)